A Heavy read….brace urself….Auschwitz

This is a long one too……hope you can enjoy your Laurie chapter for the day, I needed to sleep last night hence waiting to unload on this 5 hour drive to Vienna. First off our driver looks like my Israeli guide, Meni. They could be brothers. 🙂 He is a Libra, only child, from Poland, covered in tattoos and super nice. Our morning began today with a short walk through the green skinny beautiful lush park that circles the entire old town of Krakow to find a real breakfast place instead of the hotel spread. We wanted a better choice to fill us up for the drive. I had my best cup of coffee yet at this cute French cafe. Strong and dark that I am geared up for this expression of myself and recapture of a heavy deep day yesterday…..

After driving the entire parameter and throughout Krakow yesterday I have re-rated my choice and like Prague better, just loved this main square in Kraków. We were picked up for our full day tour by a van to scoop up the other 6 passengers for the 1.5 hr drive to Auschwitz. A couple from Canada with of course NJ roots that my mom got to talk her childhood towns with them, a Finland couple, and another couple from Ireland who were my seat mates. I was in the back back being the smallest and my mom in the front seat, better choice for her body mechanics, bumpy in the back :-). Once we were all picked up they showed a disturbing black/white video of the stories of the torture during these days in the 1940’s, a prelude to the day of learning and viewing the horror of these times. After watching I stared out the window and fell asleep actually. I figured I would get the same view on the way back and was tired.

My eyes opened to the view of a an Outlet mall, McDonalds, lots of traffic, I am in awe with how many tourists come to tour this place still standing to represent an important part of history. I have been pondering how I was going to write about this for my own memory as it is an experience NEVER to be forgotten that I want it in writing for me to reference back to it for my own reasons.

I have been to many holocaust museums and memorials in my lifetime, yet nothing has compared to walking the grounds of Auschwitz!!! I have to acknowledge Juliet, our personal group guide for the day as her job must be the most difficult and one that would depress me to do on a regular basis. She was so knowledgeable of this history. When I inquired how many tours she guides per day, she said you can only do it once as it’s too heavy. She delivered facts and stories with such compassion in her tone of voice I was impressed and mesmerized by her ability to do so. She had a huge heart and you felt her deep empathy for the prisoners whom she referred to as victims.

Our group of 8 was grouped with 1-2 other groups as I would guess there were approx 20/30 of us that toured with Juliet. This place had a serious system of how they maneuver the masses all around these 2 camps we explored. As 2.1 million people visited here last year. We went through an x-ray machine to get in, seriously reminded me of entering the premises of the AZ woman’s prison I have visited. Ugh!! We were all provided headphones and a receiver to put around our necks as Juliet talks to you through your ears the entire day. So much history exists on these grounds. As I’m sure all of you have seen so many holocaust and WW2 movies. We were here….. Auschwitz 1 and Auschwitz 2- Birkenau. These are the largest Nazi German concentration camps and death camps. Crazy death and Camp are words that go together?! 1.3 million people died here, 1.1 million were Jews, 150k were polish people, 23k gypsies, and the list continues….6 million total died during these times. A goal to exterminate the Jewish population…..crazy thought and once again solidifies my importance of marrying Jewish and to procreate a Jewish child if/when that is destined for my future?! She shared that 900 people attempted to escape while here for which 190 were successful. The story was shared about a man who did escape and he lived to be 98 years old only passing away 6 months ago. He came back to visit 55 years later which was 21 years ago. I loved hearing those stories as the majority of the day was not these stories. This mans way of life warmed my heart as she said he lived the end of his life by the sea being grateful for life! Wow!!! A mindset one must choose after living through this nightmare.

The nightmares really came to life for me today in a sick to your stomach sort of way….like in all holocaust museums, we saw a pile of children and adult shoes, suitcases, jewelry, hair brushes, eye glasses, personal belongings that were collected from all the people arriving at the camps thinking they were finally going to get the opportunity to take a shower completely unaware they were walking into a gas chamber. The most heavy display my eyes witnessed was a huge room filled with prisoners hair on display behind a glass wall. It was piled high pony tails, long hair of every color, mostly brown and grey. This was sickening to see and think about, my mom and I both looked at each other with indescribable faces of disgust and sadness. As Juliet’s voice explained what we were looking at and how it has been preserved and why. We toured the inside of these barracks where the people lived, and the term lived is not even appropriate, more like existed, not even sure that word serves its purpose. We saw a stone wall where you would be shot if you broke a rule, and you were shot in front of others completely naked as to humiliate you and teach a lesson to others. An example of a rule was as simple as going to the bathroom as there were only 2 designated times a day for this bodily function. The wall had a memorial with flowers in front of it now. The toilet room, the SS officers rooms, you get the picture as we went in and out of many barracks, and walked 2 KM around this first original Camp. It was surrounded with 2 barbed wire fences, had a Skeleton sign that said STOP, look out towers etc. like you see in the movies but truly unreal in person. FYI…..today was an AZ hot type day…..which they pointed out to us, imagine working in this heat while being starved and not given water, hence why so many died without being killed. As well as the opposite of snow and cold weather. The bed time was 9 pm and no doors or windows could be open and the amount of people assigned to one room was barbaric. Seriously people were treated like animals- even worse. It made our state prison and jails resemble the four seasons.

We saw where the orchestra was set up, as in 1941 the prisoners were given musical instruments to play, it was to help the line ups go to the right beat/March. As well you could see where the artwork was on the walls, again some dark and some happy pictures. Truly shows how the power of ones mind can take you to a different realm or reality based on how you think. Even in these horrific conditions very few but some kept their spirit alive. Made me think of Victor Frankl, the author of Mans Search for Meaning, an enlightening powerful book I have read. I highly recommend it if you have not read it. The average life span for someone in the camp was 3 months. My mom commented she would not last a Day. All the thoughts you have while walking these grounds are beyond your imagination as seeing the movies and being here was a night and day difference, bizarre! These so called showers held 2000 people at a time and took 20-30 minutes to exterminate them all. The crematories were operated 24/7. Ugh!!!

Once this camp was walked completely we were given a break and then driven to the Auschwitz 2- Birkenau Camp, about 5 min down the road. When we arrived, the magnitude of these grounds was mind blowing. This Camp was spread out and looked like 3-4 times larger. It was SO hot out and my mom needed a rest. She walked the initial part, listened to the first talk but then went back to the waiting area for me as they stated it was another hour of walking-touring this Camp which had many ruins to view. The train tracKs like you see in the movies with an actual train car where the people were lined up and looked over to determine their immediate fate- death or work! The brick barracks and the wooden ones, the chimneys, an actual memorial black marble type structure etc.

I became friendly with a girl who was touring alone. She was young and from Galway, Ireland- my fav spot in Ireland. It’s almost numbing to be in such a heavy awful place and start having a normal conversation with someone. Like how our subconscious protects us. The part of our brain that knows your on overload and steps in to provide some normalcy to a moment. We walked these grounds discussing places we have traveled and places we will go, she told me about her family, that she is an accountant, why she is in Kraków, etc. Such a sweet nice girl! She recommended a book she is reading The Auschwitz Tattoo Artist, I think I will get it. The luxuries we get to experience and yet you think what this whole place really represents as we enter yet another disturbing room together. This Camp was worse in my eyes, if that is even possible. The slates of wood stacked like a bunk bed of threes that 6 people had to cram into a tight space, the photos of the actual prisoners that lined the walls with the date of birth and date of death….. The facts that Juliet kept sharing. I finally have a different grasp of why my father only wanted to drive American cars. We learned about all the large companies who used the prisoners to provide work for them, whom never served any consequences for such a horrible unforgivable act. Hugo Boss provided and made all the SS officers uniforms, BMW, and a list of 60 other companies that we all use regularly without a thought were a part of this and profited from abusing these innocent prisoners who were forced to work 12 hour days slaving while not being given water or food. These companies never held accountable.

232k children perished at these death camps while 650 people survived. This place is visited most by people of Poland, second by Americans, 3rd by Jews, and 4th by Germans. This fact interested me and sort of surprised me too. I’m also curious if this statistic was true as no one asked me who I was or how I was represented. I also pondered the thought if skin heads/ white power types come here, since anti-semitism is a problem in the world do people come here and think differently than me? I’m sure, people have their own thoughts…..I was just curious. So many thoughts went through this interesting curious brain of mine today. The tour ended with Juliet saying that she feels everyone should see this place as to ensure it never happens again, she also mentioned that similar things happen all over the world still today. This made me think of all the people being tortured, bombed, abused in other parts of the world- the stuff I see on the news which I try not to watch. Is there something I can be doing to help the innocent people whom are stuck in places of war fare? The perspectives you are presented when witnessing a part of life I feel a connection too being Jewish and I don’t even have holocaust survivors in my family. I remembered the ceremony I had the privilege of attending recently with Mary Israel at Beth El and how that teen anger took such an interest in this part of history, just because it interested him. I want to be a bigger part of honoring this story and the innocent people who had their perfect lives taken away from them. That I know as a fact and feel compelled to be sure I always attend this ceremony every year to be sure to remember and to speak about to the generations that follow me.

We board the bus for the journey back to Krakow. I stare out the window and now see all these dense forest trees and recall the scenes from movies where people would hide and live in these fields. Imagine the survivors who escaped wandering this area. I noticed the Polish cemetery filled with colorful flowers from visitors. I talk with my Irish seat mates about the heavy day. She says she is glad she went although a tough thing to witness. I agreed. My mom and I decide we need to see Schindler’s Factory since it was missed on the tour yesterday. We are dropped off near the main square, grab a delicious creamy gelato on a cone and walk to find a golf cart guy.

We are now headed to the factory of Schindler who helped to hide out many Jewish people and provide fake documents to Jewish people during the war. Unfortunately the tickets to tour were sold out for the day but they had a free exhibition room to tour that was a consolation to the reaL deal. This was actually a perfect way to end the heavy day as it was all positive to some degree. You got to read about and see how people hid, how other selfless humble amazingly incredible humanitarians helped these innocent people escape the horror. They actually put their own lives in jeopardy to help another. The authentic letters, poems, photographs, stories, etc of the Zogoto. We take photos and depart to catch the tram to find food. Once again a day with barely any eating 🙂

We walk the square searching for the perfect restaurant. We sit outside decide we will progressively eat again ha. First an Italian place, a yummy shrimp scampi dish with the best white wine, butter, garlic sauce to dip fresh bread. Then off to search again….. we looked at 10 menus, found another Michelin place and viola. We sit inside for the Air…..this first dish is worth mentioning……if your still reading(lol) A huge flat-like paper crispy potato pancake with red caviar, Sour cream, and red onion. Mouth watering delish!!! Another Apple/vodka martini, and we shared a steak dish with sweet Madeira sauce. If you travel you know only Americans use ice, well we of course request it everywhere….most places just give 2-4 cubes, this place brought out a bucket, I was a happy camper. The amazing part is how cheap this 5 star restaurant costs…..entire meal under $50. As we exited the restaurant the most amazing sunset was painted in the sky. Pink and blue clouds, with many birds flying, church bells ringing, and a live concert in the square. A scene out of a movie. We walked back and passed a Starbucks, my American soul was craving a toffee nut iced coffee. I had to have it 🙂 A cute little polish boy was playing an accordion sitting on the sidewalk, I snapped a photo and gave him some coins. Super cute face!!! We got home by 9:30 pm and actually went to bed early.

This drive is all free way, the speed limit must be non-existent as we are driving FAST. Vienna awaits…..until later.

Love you all- miss you too!
Love Laurie Sue XO